Welcome 2010
Ten years ago today I was married to my first husband. We’d just spent a New Years Eve doing something I honestly don’t even remember. The only thing I do remember about it was that we were living with my father and when we woke up ten years and one day ago, we were watching the year 2000 ring in across the country and realizing there was no Y2K madness to be afraid of.
Today I’m in a very different place. I’m divorced from him and someone else. I don’t speak to my father anymore. I am on my own and making a lot more money. And I have LC and this great apartment with him.
This last decade brought me two divorces and more heartbreak than I ever thought possible. So today I welcome a new one. A new decade in time. Even though it’s not a round decade in age for me, it still feels like something big. Some big passage of time. Possibly more because of all that happened than anything else.
In the past ten years I divorced two husbands, moved five times, met and banished my very own Mr. Big, loved four cats and lost three, and found what I imagine to be my life’s partner. That’s a big ten years.
Today, I look forward to ten more. Maybe I’ll get married, maybe I’ll have kids. Maybe I won’t. I intend to drink a lot of good wine, eat a lot of great food, enjoy the company of the best friends I’ve ever known, and be happy. I am determined that my life has turned around and I’m going to keep it and me on track.
I stopped doing resolutions a long time ago. I resolve not to resolve. It’s a good plan as I always manage to meet my goal. I hope for a lot though. And I hope not to lose hope. I hope for the best.
So to all of you on the first day of 2010 and of a new decade, I wish the same. I wish for good wine, good food, good friends, and hope. May you find your dreams. Happy New Year!
Filed under retrospective | Comments (8)Goodbye 2009
New Years Eve is a party holiday for, well, everyone. But for me…. okay it’s *that*, but it’s also a time of reflection. It’s the one moment when an entire year is behind you and you can see exactly where you’ve been. You have that one moment to reflect on what was and make decisions about how to change it, or not. You can take a finite measurement of time and really look at who you were and what happened. I know I’m a little crazy, but that’s pretty cool to me. So every year on this day, I find myself taking stock of what was. And tomorrow, I will take stock of what could be.
So there’s a lot about this year that I’m not proud of. There is, most notably, Big. And the fact that he nearly wrecked everything for me. There was the unforgettable moment he moved into his own apartment….. only to move back the next day. And then dump me when I put my foot down. Yeah… I’ve gotten pretty used to glossing over all of that but there it is. There is also my return to the land of common sense when I went back to LC and asked him to forgive me. He said yes, but we had a rough time of it there for a while. While it may not have been his intention to punish me, he was angry and, well, he did. And we both know that. But by the grace of 2009, we somehow rode it out together. And now we’re here. We moved into our new apartment 10 days ago. We’re nearly unpacked. We go to bed every night together. In the last six months, our life has turned around 180 degrees.
At the beginning of last year, I was full of hope for us. I talked about giving us a real chance. I was ready. And now, at the end of the year, I am surprised to find that I actually achieved that goal. Believe me, no one is more surprised than me but facts are facts. And we may have taken the scenic route to getting here, but get here we did. And hey, at least I know now that the car we rode in can take it. 
My hope for next year is to take more of a freeway to my goals, rather than the twisty windy scenic route. But all in all, this year wasn’t quite so bad after all.
Filed under lucky charms, retrospective | Comments (5)Not so bad after all
Well gentle readers, today is the very last day of 2008 and it’s been kind of a wild ride. I thought as a tribute to this past year, I might reflect for just a moment on what it has been.
First of all, it was the year that brought you this blog. So if you can find nothing else to celebrate, I expect to you to down a glass of bubbly to at least that much.
It is also the year that you all have learned about Asian Grocery Guy, The Friend, The Insinuator, The Manchild, Mr. Big, The Philospher, Possible Prince, Retro Boy, The Set Up, The Stalker, Tragic Sundae, my What If, Zombie Guy, and one guy who just never got a name. And of course, LC. Some stories were more significant than others. Some were heartbreaks, and some were just comedy. One story just ended, and one is hopefully just getting started. And although the names have all been changed, the events are all very real. And this year, 2008, was the year I got to share all of these things with you.
This was the year I truly learned to be my own woman. This was the first year in a long time I did not allow to be ruled or ruined by an ex-husband. This was the year I rejected so many dates that I truly earned the title of One Date Wonder. And this was the year that title also became ironic as I started to settle in with one man.
This year I learned how to walk away. I learned how to heal. And most importantly, I learned how to take risks again.
So yes, 2008 brought me some bad things. I shed a lot of tears and felt a few heartbreaks. Sometimes I was so quietly desperate even you couldn’t hear it. But those aren’t the sum total of this year. This year brought me new friends, new confidence, and maybe even new love. And any year that offers all of that cannot be so bad after all.
2008 was a good year. And I believe, right down to the soles of my jaded little feet, that 2009 is going to be even better.
Happy New Year my friends! May 2009 be everything you wish for, and more.
Filed under retrospective | Comments (9)
