Random thoughts
August 18th, 2008
I know you love it when I’m all scatterbrained and I post anyway. I just know you do. So, just to oblige you, here is this:
- I adore the smell of fresh clean boy with manly soap. Seriously. Whatever they put in men’s soap and deodorant is like crack to me. Mr. Big is now talking about leaving his soap in my apartment for just this reason.
- Secretly, I’m sure he will never do such a thing. Because that would mean something of his would live at my place. And he is especially phobic about stuff like that.
- I am still battling that f-ing cat litterbox smell. I’m starting to think it’s all in my head. My friends say my apartment doesn’t smell, and yet I smell it every time I walk in the door. What’s up with that? And please send help.
- I am tired.
- Today is a very weird day. By the end of it, I’m sure I won’t like it anymore. But right now, in just this second, I can find at least one thing to be grateful for. I could find more if I got another email. Although I feel I may never, and I will be back where I started.
- I don’t know how, but I still miss him. Maybe I always will.
- I am on the verge of making a new life. Teetering on the edge really. Just dipping my toe into the pool. Just one little breeze and I’m all in. Go on, I dare you…. push me.
- I’ve been looking for reasons to start over for months now. I am just starting to realize the only real reason is just for me. And I am ready in so many ways. All I need is a little help and I’m there. I will make this happen. I think.
5 Responses to “Random thoughts”
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De-lurking to give you a suggestion… I’ve always had cats, and the cat litter smell is honestly one of the most disgusting smells out there to me. I’ve found that the best way to avoid having your entire home reek of cat piss is to keep the litterbox in the bathroom or somewhere else that’s not used very often or for long periods of time. Scoop it every day, and replace all the litter in the box at least once a week. If you have more than one cat, do this wayyyy more often. It sounds like a bit of work, but it should help. That room might have a hint of smell, but your entire place shouldn’t.
And Mondays = scatterbrainedness for everyone, so don’t apologize
I swear on all that’s holy, I do all of that. I also spray the area with Lysol one or twice a day and have an automatic Lysol air freshener up there. (Which is funny because it actually fires a tiny aerosol can every 18 minutes and the noise cracks me up. Good thing I live alone, I guess.)
I am a huge fan of starting over. I’ve done it often - mostly for the right reasons (FOR something, rather that running away from something) - and I’ve pretty much never been sorry. Each step taken takes us to our final destination. (Wow, I really didn’t mean for that to sound as cheesy as it does.) I’m actually trying to get my Mr. Big to move away right now - not because I want to get rid of him, but because his life has been shit and he needs a fresh start. Not to say I’m encouraging him running away - I think he needs to find a good reason to go.
You are not the first to make the distinction between running *from* and running *to* something. I’m afraid I may be doing a little of both though.
C’mon in. The water’s fine.
Is it a heated pool?
I love starting over. It’s such a refreshing feeling.
Regarding the cat litter, have you ever heard of Scentsy? I buy the Car Candle and hang it above the litter box. It works great for me.
http://www.scentsy.com
Good Luck!
Never tried that, will have to look into it.
How could I resist an entry on purely random things?
On the soap living at your place: He’d be odd about it? Besos (woman I am dating) left a tooth brush at my place. Seemingly accidentally, but I’m not sure. I think I froze in my tracks when I saw it still in the bathroom after she’d left. I got over it quickly. I figured…hell, if she’s here, I’d like her teeth to be clean.
Re: litterbox. I’m allergic to cats so I have no experience with them at all. However, my dog, Little Filthy, is box trained. He goes on pads, however, not litter - and I don’t think his er…by products are anything like that of a cat’s. If anything, the box smells a little like a cornchip. I think it’s easier to clean than a litterbox, too. But I do keep one of those air freshner’s a good 10 feet above the area by his box and it shoots out a blast of some scent every 15 minutes or so and that helps a lot. I think it’s lysol odor-reducing something or other.
Starting over is great. Especially if you, too, can do it without any pre-conceived notions about even yourself.
Hope you are well,
-R.
Heh, oh yes he would. First of all, he doesn’t stay over. But second, he sees it as the first step (however small) to moving in. So it was a big weird thing. I know, I know…. but seriously, not lying.